the bword

It all started when we got told to “do it” for Australia. Former Treasurer Peter Costello urged Australians to have “one (baby) for your husband and one for your wife and one for the country”. Firstly, who has a husband and a wife?  A bisexual polygamist, I suppose (but then they wouldn’t live in Australia because polygamist or not, if you are gay you can not get married, which is a whole other blog post). Secondly, who listens to Peter Costello? Well, it seems a lot of people listened to him and consequently, there was a baby boom. Even we listened, because we like to do everything he asks. Go forth and multiply we did.

Now, we are being told to stop procreating. Well, not exactly stop all together, but stop at two kids. In other words, stop shagging and having too many bambinos. No more babies for you. Stop at two, put the brakes on the baby making. The reason; more than two kids will put considerable strain on the environment.

Well, we have three children. We are over the quota. We are now officially contributing to the environment’s demise. What do they want us to do, get rid of one? Which one would we choose? I mean they are all annoying at different times, but I’m pretty sure I’d like to keep them – all of them. But it raises the question; will the third born always have the weight of the world on their cute little shoulders?

So, it seems the naysayers out there must have run out of things to make pregnant women and parents feel guilty about so they’ve come up with this new gem. Having been pregnant three times I’ve been made to feel guilty about what I ate, what I drank, what music I played to my unborn foetus and for finding out the sex of my children. Then, once the babies came I was made to feel guilty for having c-sections, not exclusively breastfeeding, control crying and for craving alone time. Now, our kids are growing, the guilt continues. This time it’s over what we feed them, how much exercise they have, how much tv they watch and daring to let them watch music videos.

And now I, like other families with three or more children, are being blamed for the demise of the planet.
Too many mouths to feed on the planet will cause it to implode. However, I refuse to feel guilty. I won’t even blame it all on Peter Costello or our stupidity for listening to him in the first place. We are happy with our three children and you finger pointers can all get stuffed.