I’m not one for motivational sayings, but I saw this and it rang true. I spend a lot of time immersed in this blog, it’s my “go to” place. It’s where my words tumble from me and I share my heart with you. Contrary to what many people believe I do not divulge all my secrets, only the ones I think may resonate with you, things I hope will in some way make you laugh or not feel so alone. Most importantly, it is my avenue to write and writing soothes, and thrills, me.
I’d be lying to say that I am not also driven somewhat by ego. I need the connection with others as much as much as I hope my willingness to share connects with you. I look at my stats and sometimes get caught up in the numbers. I look at my stagnant Facebook page numbers and question my ability to connect. I worry that somehow I am not sharing enough or giving enough of myself. I analyse my writing. Am I not good enough? I become the sheep and forget to be the tiger.
Then I stop. I breathe. I reevaluate why it is I started blogging in the first place. It wasn’t for the site visits, it was because I felt like I was drowning. I had just had my third child and I felt disconnected from the outside world. I wanted something for me. I wanted to walk into a room and have something to talk about other than my children. I wanted to show my girls that women are fearless.
I’ve turned blogging into a vehicle to pursue a variety of new writing opportunities. It’s provided me with a regular radio segment. And one day soon I will revisit my novel. Blogging has given me that drive and introduced me to so many people pursuing similar life ambitions. It’s been a gift.
This coming year I want to turn my attention away from the pursuit of blog growth and instead focus more on my words. Be more mindful of what I publish. Not worry about the thoughts of others or care so much about my lack of “popularity”. I will always fail if I judge myself against the success of others. I can not be creative if I spend time following in other’s footsteps, I must leap in different directions. The only person I have to compete against is myself. I need to challenge myself and you the reader more.
The end of the year always brings with it much reflection. I refuse to be drawn into the stupid mummy blogger debate any longer. People determined to pigeonhole women who write – to dumb down the sharing of experiences. I hate the term. I refuse to be drawn into the ridiculous behind the scenes hate groups and woe is me bullshit that tears apart segments of the blogging community. I don’t want to a part of all that nonsense. So much negativity and jealousy and game playing. People consumed by the numbers and the rules. People so consumed by fear, they forget they have a voice and a platform. They forget how lucky they are to be able to bring a variety of opinions into the forefront and instead spend their time bringing down others. What a waste. Blog brave.
A tiger doesn’t lose sleep over the opinion of sheep. These words resonate with me.